Soothing the unquiet mind
26 February 2011 04:22 PM Categories: The struggle
It may not be obvious, given my usual bloggy melancholy, but I'm in a trough right now, am in a very low place, feeling panicky, like the floor has just dropped out from under my feet, or is about to, like I'm being tossed around by the wind or that the ground is cracking open beneath me.
Yes, I'm trying to stay in the moment, to be one with my fear and sadness and feelings of inadequacy. I'm picking apart the emotions when I can, but I also need to keep from wallowing. I need to turn that panic upside down, make it useful.
When I was going through my divorce in 1998, I woke up at odd hours. I cried at strange times. I tossed and turned and when I couldn't sleep anymore, I got up and cleaned. This was before I had a laptop and wireless, before I could sit in a chair and let my mind be stroked by too much information. Trust me, it's more calming to clean than it is to hang out on Facebook or to hit Google up for more information on subjects that I don't need to know more about.
I've come up with a list of things to do when I'm falling, when it feels like my heart is going to collapse in on itself.
Here's what I have so far:
Please let me know if you have other suggestions on how to quiet my mind in a positive way. I know this is temporary, that I will come out the other end intact (or that's my hope, anyway). I just need to develop my mind-soothing techniques.
Yes, I'm trying to stay in the moment, to be one with my fear and sadness and feelings of inadequacy. I'm picking apart the emotions when I can, but I also need to keep from wallowing. I need to turn that panic upside down, make it useful.
When I was going through my divorce in 1998, I woke up at odd hours. I cried at strange times. I tossed and turned and when I couldn't sleep anymore, I got up and cleaned. This was before I had a laptop and wireless, before I could sit in a chair and let my mind be stroked by too much information. Trust me, it's more calming to clean than it is to hang out on Facebook or to hit Google up for more information on subjects that I don't need to know more about.
I've come up with a list of things to do when I'm falling, when it feels like my heart is going to collapse in on itself.
Here's what I have so far:
- Move around -- dance, sing, clean, organize
- Read a good book
- Make a plan of action
- Implement it
- Look for a job (part of making a plan of action and implementing it)
- Find something, anything, to make me laugh
- Reach out to a friend
- Write about something other than myself, my moods, my life, my past
Please let me know if you have other suggestions on how to quiet my mind in a positive way. I know this is temporary, that I will come out the other end intact (or that's my hope, anyway). I just need to develop my mind-soothing techniques.
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