writing to survive
unknotting the past and remaking the present one story at a time

"Tell me a story"

I've never thought of myself as a good storyteller. Getting the sequence of events in the right order, building the proper tension -- I can't do it out loud. Maybe it's a self-confidence problem, or it's my ever-present worry about getting things wrong or saying something horribly offensive (that's a childhood hangover right there), but piecing together a narrative is real work for me, work that I can't do with an audience. Trapped in an ice of anxiety, my imagination retreats and my mouth ceases to work properly.

Then my son started asking for stories before bed. Yes, my internal editor even made an appearance here. I had to thaw my mind, to stop caring about being bad at storytelling. Of course, he is a very receptive audience, a three-year-old with a love of the surreal. He throws out an idea and I run with it, with a little input when necessary (fun fact: did you know that monsters eat pears?).

It's freeing and satisfying, this flow of connected silliness with just a touch of plot. Good practice for writing.

If only he would fall asleep after the story. Perhaps I should be more boring.
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